Many have asked/commented on there being no blog update. I appreciate that there is interest and I am excited to see what the Lord is going to do through my obedience. I don’t say that lightly and I surely don’t say it with a proud heart, as I am well aware of my shortcomings……
But, maybe that is where my next “spill” comes from….being SO aware of my sins, my shortcomings, my inadequacies. I have been struggling to know what next to share with you. I had a bit of a clue. I had shared with you about obedience. I knew that Sunday when “God showed up” that things were “in process”, the wheels were turning said my friend Ezekial….as I spoke of, the next day the Lord allowed a conversation with a hurting woman. My very close friend Karen needed someone to cover for her that day in her office. I did, now don’t you suppose that God knew that????? He conveniently had that whole ordeal at church the morning before, then to set in motion His plan of action that day in a TAX office no less, lol……as I spoke to you of her “goosebumps”….I worried it would sound prideful.
Within a few days of this blog getting underway, I received many encouraging remarks, requests for FB friends, knowledge of my testimony being shared openly among other women of the Lord, private messages sent to me thanking me for sharing, etc….MY POINT???
I DO NOT KNOW, lol….I have been asked to serve this week at a Gideon Awards Dinner. I was excited, it has been quite some time since my services, lol, were needed. Another ministry opportunity is being prayed about. Last week, I stepped out of my comfort zone and tried to encourage a “reader”. Accepted the challenge set before me today as I spoke with the waitress about raising her son in church,etc…. by her testimony she was saved, THANK GOD, because I probably would have passed out if the Lord had told me to witness to her at breakfast!
This whole thing is random, sorry…..just speaking from the heart and attempting to follow the Lord’s leading. See, I haven’t been in great “walking terms” with the Lord for the last several years. NOT to lay it all of on motherhood, but in reality..life just isn’t easy at times. I am the one that walked away from the closeness of my Saviour, our relationship suffered for this. I so remember the desire that I had when I left VaBch, I was ready for whatever the Father saw fit for me. Well, seems He had A LOT of “stuff” in store, some at my own failing and some appointed by Him….some good, some bad, some GREAT and some, WELL>>>>> UGH, lol…..
Why do I bring up that whole 10yr ago point??? Because for the first time in a long time, I can feel that moving again in my life. I am excited to see the Lord’s work. I again, have the need to be found faithful, not just survive. Now, I do understand that I am my worst critic, but I know there are many areas that I could done a better job in. But, here’s the deal….I am tryin, I am enjoying the journey again, I have obeyed things that I NEVER wanted to obey…..
I tried VERY hard to tell God that I didn’t want another child after Brayden ( i know that sounds weird, but it was a bad deal). I was done with kids, done….but the Lord made it very clear to me, some of ya’ll were even asked for your opinion on the matter. But, I knew I had no choice, so pridefully, I gave God, YES, GOD…. you know that ONE that made like the WHOLE world????? Yeh, I made a deal with Him, “If I can conceive within in this SMALL window of opportunity that I am willing to give to You, then and ONLY then will I obey…..” Do I have to tell you that out of that lil’ discussion I received news about 12 wks later that we were expecting….TWINS……….yep, stupid me……
hahaha, So, you can understand that when the Lord then told me some 2yrs later that I was supposed to HomeSchool my boys, I reluctantly obeyed….Come to think of it, some of the same people I spoke to about the whole kid thing was the same for school too……man, I really gotta watch that whole “Wise Counsel” thing, LOL……
When God told me to put my name on that Cross a few yrs back, I did, but didn’t know or like what was to come from that at all. Since, I have shared my testimony among a few people as an encouragement to them, NOW, He has me posting online for others to read and share……..
I started this update by saying….you want to know where I’ve been?? Well, I have been trying to wait on the Lord….can you tell that this is new to me? I have been thinking and praying on where to go next, what avenue, etc…..
I received an advertisement for LifeWay in the mail…on the front cover was a devotional titled…. “What Happens When Women say YES to God”………I began that book tonight. I enjoyed reading and identifying with the first chapter. She spoke of obedience, etc…but what rang truthful to me was her quoting of God taking ordinary people and doing extraordinary things IN them, THROUGH them, and WITH them…… ( personally i would add FOR them as well).
She spoke of the “real” revival coming into her life and she swears this for all women….that obedience is the way for your renewing of closeness to the Lord. Maybe that is true, as I spoke of that 10yr thing, I was in the process of obeying. I had told the Lord that I clearly did not want to retire here in Mississippi, but, I underlined that verse about “whatever state”, welp you guessed it, I wrote…..RIPLEY beside it. I meant it, I wanted to walk in obedience. Now, having said that…maybe it was the whole obedience factor that lead to the walk, I don’t know. But, I know this one thing……I may never have another blog update, I may never have another opportunity to share my testimony, I may never get an invitation to speak to a group of hurting women, etc…….who cares, what I desire most is to walk with my Lord…..if this is the end my friends, it has been eye opening. It has been revealing to me of the Lord’s desire for my closeness to Him, His amazing grace at work in my life…the renewing of my faith…the reminder that I am His, He has a plan for me, He saved me in many ways and then at the point of salvation, he alone provided and protected me, He alone is faithful and true to me and mine……..”Grace was made for lives like this”